I’m just a girl in the world

Man, this blog kicks my ass without even trying. You know all five of the people out there that actually read this thing must intimidate the hell out of me!

This post has been barely started and then barely restarted twice now. But I guess my friend Michael would tell me to just let it go. As in just write it and send it off. What’s the worst that could happen? That I have only four readers left after that?

And so there it goes, to say I offer some small proof that a woman is her own worst enemy. Probably every guy already knew that. That she would somehow brainwash herself into thinking that no future post could ever be worth anything. Because she’s not in school any more, no longer an editor, that she hasn’t been really published in… years.

That a woman must get so angry as to injure a man, to nearly maim another woman. And the reasons are far from obvious. That it takes another woman to try to stop that hurt. To try to stop that fight. That it takes a man to forgive. That maybe it takes another woman to understand.

That a young woman so sensitive to the life of all creatures. That the passing of numerous pets is so torturous to her own soul. That it takes another woman to soothe. To try to explain. To understand another’s empathy and show sympathy.

A strong young woman losing another much-loved strong woman. A woman in pain. A woman who needs you to let go.

That it would take a woman to bury the hatchet. But a woman will hold a grudge. She will sever the ties and the blood that should be thicker…

Incubus- Warning – YouTube



this year is gonna be incredible!


Wow, so to think that this daily prompt only asks us to share what we hope to accomplish in a single year… well for me, the things I hope to accomplish through the use of this blog and other formats might take a bit longer than a year to show any decent improvement. We’ll see.

Honestly, I truly hope in time that I’ll be sharing my life and work with all of you as MORE of a professional writer – one that makes a bit of a living from her work. The work toward a writing degree at Kutztown that I started back in 2009 came to a rather abrupt hault in 2011. A minor in Public Relations was to accompany that Professional Writing major. However, at this point I know much less about writing for PR than I had expected. And unfortunately, I am not sure how soon I can get back to Kutztown 😦

Another bit of progress I might hope to attain kind of takes me in a different direction. As you have all hopefully figured out, music is kind of a big deal with me. So… in a year, if I could somehow get back to being a dj in local radio, that would be a DREAM. Although, another music related goal I have set for myself might, also, mean that I could start writing and performing my own music. Or at very least figure out this guitar of mine and start hitting some of the open mics where several friends perform 🙂 Then, maybe occasionally you would see videos of me instead of Stevie or Neko or Joni. But I will always absolutely adore those women… for the way their writing and voices and styles have had such a huge influence on what I want to be when I grow up 🙂

So wish me luck!

Photo on 1-2-14 at 3.48 PM

Why make resolutions against things that aren’t so bad?

Ok, so the last post for the magic prompt was kind of lame. In my opinion. Simply because it was something I wrote a few months ago. The real intent for my writing today was to show you all some sort of reflection on the past year of my life. (Spoiler: this post doesn’t end up being much of a reflection on anything but last night.)

The most amazing inspiration for me to stumble upon this morning came from Tori Thomas, a DJ for WMMR… “My mom used to say that whatever you’re doing at the stroke of midnight on New Year’s Eve will influence your life for the rest of the year. I’ve always believed that. Make it a great night!” https://www.facebook.com/torithomasradio

Now, upon initial examination of last night’s events, my tendency to over think and seek out the negative points first reared its ugly head. I said “Hmmm I was once again trying to tap a perfect draft for an awesome and patient man. Guess I’ll be bartending this year just like I’ve been for the last five…” However, the guy standing next to me, attempting to fix the tap, is a friend. And I wasn’t working at a bar, but helping him with his keg. His response to Tori’s comment was that maybe it just meant in the coming year he’d be right my side more often…

I suppose the more general conclusion I could pull from this is that I was hanging out with good people instead of making myself more of a lonely soul by my (almost) insistence to stay home alone on New Years Eve. Maybe it’s not where I should have been… I probably should have been at work. But I took a little bit of a physical and mental health unpaid night off. It was a fun night with some of the best, newest friends I’ve made in the Valley. Didn’t get into too much trouble. And it was an awesome end to 2013!

(By the way, the name of the song is “Leave My Blues at Home”.)

when you just can’t seem to let it go…

First, I would like to say this is a song written and originally performed by Leslie Feist. However, when I found this cover (these guys were going by Redtrack at the time) I liked it much better for this post. Being inspired to post something relating to an upset feeling over family this afternoon, I sought out a song to accompany my words. Seemingly the new standard by which I form my posts here and on wordpress.

What does this song say to you? I have been accused of relating to and learning more about artists whose lyrics most often speak of romantic love. While that may be the case — and it is quite possible that is what Feist originally meant in her lyrics — I felt it perfect to express the feeling I have today for someone I know as family who regards me with the warmth she’d have for any stranger on the street. Giving the occasional tease that there might still be a relationship. That the bare minimum of communication is sufficient for adult sisters and friends. That’s alright. I love, I love, I love… the trouble that you give me. Not really.